God, I'm scared of what I'm turning into. I just got finished watching three episodes of "Sex in the City" and I actually enjoyed it. Too much of this big city thinkin' seeping in? I don't know. I have to put some of the blame on my sister and her friend M. They're both actresses, urban centered, and critical of every woman in the city. It doesn't help that they're male friends are all gay too. They got me started on the show. I have to say that I was a bit Shanghai'd. Since I'm looking for a job and have very little money I usually stay in with them at night. They hate it when I watch baseball, so wishing as little confrontation as possible, and trying to make myself a joy to be around I watch their shows: Reverand Oprah, HD, Sex in the City, and Elimidate. At first I remained aloof, laughing at their criticism of what someone was wearing, or the idiocy of some woman for staying in such a self destructive relationship. By the end of the week I was slingin' with the best of them. "What is she thinking wearing that denim jacket with jeans," and shit like that. But it didn't stop there, I continued to think like that after I left the city. I really need to live on my own in the city... But I don't know if that will help too much. I don't really know too many people in Chicago, and when I'm in someplace completely alien I grab on to whatever is somewhat familiar... well, not really, I go to places by myself, the coffee shop, the bar, an occasional movie, but I know that I'd primarily be hanging out with them while I'm there, at least for a few months. So I'm being feminized, I'm frightened that if it gets any worse I might start understanding my ex wife, god forbid. Help me Obi Wan Kenobi, your my only hope.